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求助!我的3岁女儿迷上了特朗普

更新时间:2017-7-26 11:23:50 来源:纽约时报中文网 作者:佚名

Help! My 3-Year-Old Is Obsessed With Trump
求助!我的3岁女儿迷上了特朗普

My 3-year-old daughter is obsessed with Donald Trump.

我的三岁女儿迷上了唐纳德·特朗普。

This is a problem if 1) you live in New York City, 2) you are liberal, 3) your friends are liberal, 4) your daughter attends a liberal school and 5) your relatives are affected by the Trump administration’s travel ban.

假如:1)你住在纽约市,2)你是自由派,3)你的朋友也是自由派,4)你女儿上的是自由派学校,5)你有亲戚受特朗普政府的旅行禁令影响,那么这就很成问题了。

Yassi, my daughter, attends the kind of school that made counseling available in the wake of the 2016 presidential elections. Parents stood together comforting one another on Nov. 9 in an act of collective mourning that I hadn’t seen since Sept. 11. This is probably exactly the type of school that the Trump voters were hating on with their epic middle finger raised to the elites of this country.

我女儿亚西(Yassi)就读的是那种会在2016年总统选举之后提供心理辅导的学校。11月9日,父母们在一起互相安慰,这种集体哀悼行为是我们从9·11事件以来没有见到过的。这可能正是特朗普的选民们憎恨的那种学校,他们正对这个国家的精英高高竖起中指。

On that same morning, Yassi made few friends by screaming “Donald Trump!” at the top of her lungs in the crowded stairwell to her school. People whirled around to find the traitor. Red-faced and humiliated, I pulled her aside and said, “Shhhh, Yassi, we do not scream these things at school.” And so, an expletive was born, much more potent than any four-letter word.

就在那天上午,亚西在学校拥挤的楼梯间里高声尖叫“唐纳德·特朗普!”因此没交到多少朋友。人们转过身去寻找叛徒。我红了脸,感到很丢人,把她拉到一边说:“嘘,亚西,我们不要在学校里喊这种话。”一句骂人话就这么诞生了,比那个F打头的词都有效。

“Annabel,” she would say, turning to her best friend, “I want to tell you a secret.” Annabel would dutifully move closer.

“安娜贝尔,”她会转向她最好的朋友说,“我想告诉你一个秘密。”安娜贝尔会老老实实地向她凑近。

“Donald Trump!” Yassi would do her 3-year-old best to whisper, which, of course, turned out to be a poorly modulated stage whisper audible to anybody nearby.

“唐纳德·特朗普!”亚西会尽三岁小孩最大的努力低声耳语,当然,这样的音量调节效果不佳,周围所有人都能听到。

“What’s your name, little girl?” kindly strangers would ask her in the checkout line of a grocery store, or at the playground.

“你叫什么名字,小女孩?”好心的陌生人会在超市的结帐队伍里或者操场上问她。

“Donald Trump,” she would answer slyly, delighted by the explosion of giggles she elicited.

“唐纳德·特朗普,”她会狡猾地回答,很高兴地看到自己引得人们爆发出笑声。

We had to leave a play date early because the kids — upon Yassi’s encouragement — kept calling one another “Donald Trump” until one little girl dissolved into tears. “Your daughter keeps talking about Donald Trump,” Yassi’s teacher reported, eyeing me suspiciously as if my morning news routine started (and ended) with Breitbart.

我们和别的孩子一起玩的时候不得不提早离开,因为孩子们在亚西的鼓励之下,不断互相称呼对方为“唐纳德·特朗普”,直到一个小女孩哭了起来。“你的女儿一直在谈论唐纳德·特朗普,”亚西的老师说,她怀疑地看着我,好像我的早间新闻阅读一直以布莱巴特网站(Breitbart)开始并结束。

It all began during the campaign, when Mr. Trump seemed like little more than a joke and nobody thought he had a fighting chance. “Who do you want to win the election, Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump?” I would ask Yassi. “Donald Trump!” she would scream excitedly.

这一切都是从竞选期间开始的,当时特朗普似乎只是一个笑话,没人以为他有战胜的机会。“你希望谁赢得选举,希拉里·克林顿(Hillary Clinton)还是唐纳德·特朗普?”我会问亚西。“唐纳德·特朗普!”她会激动地尖叫起来。

Who could blame her? He shared a first name with Donald Duck, and his last name rhymed with “jump,” her favorite activity. She was never able to pronounce Hillary Clinton, which evolved into “Hairy Clinton,” and then finally, “Mustache.” (I can’t pretend to follow a toddler’s logic, but it appears this was one more demographic with which Secretary Clinton failed to resonate.)

谁能责怪她?他和唐老鸭(Donald Duck)同名,他的姓和“跳”(jump)押韵,蹦蹦跳跳可是她最喜欢的活动。她从来没法正确读出希拉里·克林顿的名字,后来在她口里变成了“毛茸茸克林顿”(Hairy Clinton),最后变成了“胡子”(我不能假装自己理解一个幼儿的逻辑,但他们似乎是又一个克林顿国务卿难以征服的群体。)

After the election, his name, like everything else, was no longer very funny. To me, Yassi’s obsession with Donald Trump represented the radical disjuncture between the brave new world we adults came to inhabit and the innocent world of a child, where even the names of autocratic despots are reduced to lyrical rhymes. Kids are sponges, and every conversation — public and private — was saturated with his name.

大选之后,他的名字和其他一切事情一样,已经不再那么有趣了。对我来说,亚西对唐纳德·特朗普的痴迷代表着我们大人开始生活于其中的美丽新世界,与一个孩子的天真世界之间存在的根本分歧,在孩子的世界里,即使是专制独裁者的名字也可以变成诗歌的韵脚。所有公共和私人谈话都渗透了他的名字,而孩子们就像海绵一样。

Yassi’s father is Iranian-Canadian and was affected by the first travel ban, which included permanent residents from the blacklisted countries. For several weeks, he was forced to cancel business trips overseas for fear of being denied re-entry to the United States. Even under the revised travel ban, Yassi’s Iranian-born grandparents would have had a hard time entering the country, in spite of their Canadian passports.

亚西的父亲是伊朗裔加拿大人,第一次旅行禁令中包括来自黑名单国家的永久居民,所以他也受到了影响。几周以来,他被迫取消海外商务旅行,担心被拒绝重返美国。即使根据修改后的旅行禁令,亚西在伊朗出生的祖父母也很难进入美国,尽管他们拥有加拿大护照。

For Persian New Year, in March, Yassi’s grandparents gave her cherubic twin baby dolls, one dressed in blue overalls, the other in a light pink dress. Naturally, Yassi named them Donald Trump and Mustache. “You can’t name a baby doll ‘Donald Trump,’ ” I admonished her, trying not to laugh. Not that Mustache was much more becoming.

在3月的波斯历新年时,亚西的祖父母送了她一对胖乎乎的双胞胎娃娃,一个穿着蓝色的工作服,另一个穿着浅粉色的裙子。自然,亚西给他们起名叫“唐纳德·特朗普”和“胡子”。“你不能给一个小娃娃起名叫‘唐纳德·特朗普’,”我忍着笑告诫她。当然“胡子”也不是那么合适。

Of course, the best way to get a 3-year-old to continue doing something annoying is to try to stop her. So we bathed Donald Trump, dressed Donald Trump in his blue overalls and then gently put Donald Trump to bed next to his twin.

要想让一个3岁孩子继续做些烦人的事情,最好的办法当然就是试图阻止她。所以我们给唐纳德·特朗普洗澡,给唐纳德·特朗普穿上他的蓝色工作服,然后轻轻地把唐纳德·特朗普放在床上,让他睡在他的双胞胎姊妹身边。

“Doesn’t Donald Trump look cozy in his new bed?” I asked her as baby Donald Trump snuggled under the covers of his little trundle bed.

“唐纳德·特朗普睡在新床上很舒服吧?”唐纳德·特朗普宝宝躺在小小的婴儿床上,盖上了被子的时候,我问她。

“Mommy, Donald Trump is my best friend,” she replied.

“妈妈,唐纳德·特朗普是我最好的朋友,”她回答。

With his blinking blue eyes and small tuft of blond hair, baby Donald Trump seemed more like a joke than a threat to the world order. As Sigmund Freud theorized, by turning something threatening into a game, we rob it of its power over us. In this way, play transforms a passive experience into an active one, allowing the child to gain mastery over a threat. Yassi was onto something.

唐纳德·特朗普宝宝有一闪一闪的蓝眼睛和一小缕金发,它似乎更像是一个笑话,而不是对世界秩序的威胁。正如西格蒙德·弗洛伊德(Sigmund Freud)的理论,通过把具有威胁的东西变成游戏,我们可以剥夺它对我们产生的力量。以这种方式,让孩子掌握对一个威胁的控制权,玩耍可以将一种消极体验变成积极的体验。亚西有了大发现。

Her childish irreverence for authority made me realize the way even liberals give Mr. Trump too much importance by parsing every tweet and speaking about him in hushed tones. It’s easy to feel powerless by the deluge of depressing headlines. But by subverting his authority even in subtle, silly ways, we loosen his herculean grasp on us.

她对待权威的那种幼稚的无礼使我意识到,即使是对于自由主义者来说,解析特朗普的每一条推文,并且总是以严肃的语气说起他,会让他显得太重要了。大量令人沮丧的新闻标题很容易使我们产生无力感。但是,即使是以微妙、愚蠢的方式去颠覆他的权威,我们也可以摆脱他对我们的巨大控制。

One day, when Yassi’s father came home from work, she motioned to his ear. “Can I ask you something?” He obediently leaned down.

有一天,亚西的父亲下班回家时,她示意让他过来。“我可以问你点事情吗?”他乖乖地靠过去。

“Donald Trump,” she whispered triumphantly.

“唐纳德·特朗普,”她兴高采烈地低声说。

“O.K., Yassi, let’s try something else. Can you say Vladimir Putin?” He winked. “After all, that’s who’s really in charge here.”

“好吧,亚西,我们试着说点别的吧。你能说‘弗拉基米尔·普京’(Vladimir Putin)吗?”他挤了挤眼睛。“毕竟,他才是这里真正管事的人呀。”

“Vladimir Poopy?” she asked, and then began giggling hysterically.

“弗拉基米尔·便便(Vladimir Poopy)?”她问,然后歇斯底里地咯咯笑了起来。

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