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关于特朗普,更糟糕的也许还在后头呢

更新时间:2017-2-18 11:18:31 来源:纽约时报中文网 作者:佚名

Well, Trump Watchers, Things Could Be Worse
关于特朗普,更糟糕的也许还在后头呢

I know a lot of you were saying in December that this administration wouldn’t last a month. But I’ll bet you didn’t actually have “worry about collapse of the government” written down on your schedule for February.

我知道12月的时候,你们当中有很多人说这个政府撑不过一个月。但我敢打赌,你们并没有真正把“担心政府会崩溃”写进自己2月份的行事历里。

Americans who went into a state of shock after the election are now floating in new, hitherto-uncharted realms of worry. We’ve learned that Donald Trump’s national security adviser, Michael Flynn, talked with the Russians before the inauguration. And, sources told The Times, other Trump associates also talked with Russian intelligence officers during the campaign.

选举后陷入震惊状态的美国人,如今飘进一个新的、迄今尚且无人涉足的忧虑世界。我们了解到,唐纳德·特朗普的国家安全顾问迈克尔·弗林(Michael Flynn)在总统就职之前与俄罗斯人进行了会谈。而且,消息来源告诉时报,其他特朗普的同僚也在竞选期间与俄罗斯情报官员进行了交谈。

What about Trump himself? Any chance that he encouraged Flynn to chat with the Russian ambassador about policy before he was president? Wouldn’t that be, um, super-illegal?

至于特朗普本人呢?在担任总统之前,他有没有可能支持弗林与俄罗斯大使聊一聊政策?这难道不是……呃……超违法的吗?

Wow. If you thought a successful President Trump was the worst possible scenario, imagine an egomaniac who feels threatened with being a “loser,” back to the wall. In the interest of public tranquillity we will not dwell on the nuclear codes in his office.

哇。如果你认为一个成功的特朗普总统会是最糟糕的可能情况,不妨想象一个极端自大的人觉得受了威胁,觉得自己可能会被逼到走投无路,成为一个“失败者”。为了公众的安宁,我们不会去讨论他的办公室里的核武器密码。

From the start, the Trump administration was a dark combination of mean and inept. But it was, on occasion, at least sort of mesmerizing. For instance, on Wednesday the nominee for secretary of labor went down the drain. Because somebody thought it was a good plan to go for a cabinet member with a history that includes employing an illegal immigrant housekeeper and an ex-wife who once went on “Oprah” to talk about spousal abuse.

从一开始,特朗普的政府就是一个充满恶意与无能的黑暗组合。但有时它至少有点令人迷惑。比如周三,他的劳工部长提名白忙活一场,因为有人认为选择一个有点黑历史的人入阁是个好主意,这些历史包括雇用非法移民担任管家,以及前妻曾在“奥普拉”(Oprah)节目上谈论配偶如何虐待自己。

Things are so dire, people are feeling sympathy for Kellyanne Conway. Did you see that poor woman trying to answer questions about Flynn on the “Today” show? She looked as though she’d been hit over the head with a skillet.

事态如此糟糕,人们对凯莉安·康维(Kellyanne Conway)感到同情。你看到那个可怜的女人在“今日”(Today)节目上试图回答有关弗林的问题吗?她看上去好像被煎锅砸中了脑袋。

Back in the good old days last week, Kellyanne was in trouble for violating the rule against federal officials giving endorsements. (“I’m going to give a free commercial here: Go buy it today, everybody. You can find it online.”) It was a pretty good crisis, actually. The kind of thing we could have complained about at dinner parties for a month without losing our appetites.

回到上周的美好日子,凯莉安因为违反联邦官员做商业宣传的规定而遇到麻烦。(“我在这里打个免费广告:今天就去买,大家都去。网上可以找到。”)那件事其实是个很不错的危机,是那种可以供我们在晚饭上抱怨一个月也不会倒胃口的事情。

The majority of American voters who didn’t support Donald Trump used to watch him on TV with a kind of cynical amusement as he bragged about fake election results and crowd sizes. Now every time it happens you can’t help thinking — wow, is this guy really unhinged? On Wednesday, in the middle of a press conference with the prime minister of Israel, Trump responded to a question about anti-Semitism in America by immediately pointing out he had won 306 Electoral College votes. (“We were not supposed to crack 220.”)

不支持唐纳德·特朗普的大多数美国选民曾经带着玩世不恭的快乐,看着他在电视上对选举作假和出席就职典礼的人数夸夸其谈。现在,这种事每次发生,都会让你情不自禁地想——哇,这个家伙是不是真的疯了?周三,在与以色列总理的新闻发布会上,特朗普回答一个关于美国反犹太主义的问题时,很快把话题转向自己赢得了306张选举人票。(“原来以为我们过不了220票的。”)

And the president was so out to sea he couldn’t come up with a consistent cover story for why Flynn left. His press secretary said Trump had requested Flynn’s resignation due to a “trust issue.” But when Trump showed up in person, he seemed to believe the whole thing was orchestrated by “the fake media” and a different chief executive from another planet.

而总统是如此离谱,关于弗林的离开,他讲不出一个前后一致的借口。他的新闻秘书说,特朗普因为“信任问题”要求弗林离职。但是当特朗普亲自出现时,他似乎相信整个事情是由“造假的媒体”以及来自另一个星球的首席执行官一手策划的。

“It’s really a sad thing that he was treated so badly,” the president told the press conference. “People are trying to cover up for a terrible loss that the Democrats had under Hillary Clinton.”

“他被那么糟糕地对待真是很可悲的,”总统在记者招待会上说:“人们试图掩盖民主党人在希拉里·克林顿(Hillary Clinton)带领下的一场可怕失败。”

Being stuck with a loony, unqualified president seemed less threatening when we were under the assumption that he’d be surrounded by at least some people who knew what they were doing. Now, the more of them we meet, the less secure we feel. Trump has a senior policy adviser, Stephen Miller, who sounds like a really unpopular college sophomore complaining about his grades. He had a national security adviser who said he couldn’t remember for sure whether he talked with the Russian ambassador about American sanctions before the inauguration.

如果我们能假定总统身边的人都知道自己在做什么,那么一个疯癫无能的总统似乎倒也不能么可怕了。现在,我们愈是看到总统身边的人,就愈觉得不安全。特朗普的高级政策顾问史蒂芬·米勒(Stephen Miller)说起话来像一个不受欢迎的大二学生抱怨自己的成绩。他的国家安全顾问说自己不能确定是否曾在总统就职前与俄罗斯大使谈论美国制裁的问题。

Well, at least the National Security Council still has Steve Bannon.

好吧,至少国家安全委员会还有史蒂夫·班农(Steve Bannon)。

So how do we keep our cool when our world is overheating? Try reminding yourself that there are things in this world that are not Donald Trump’s fault:

那么,当世界在发狂时,我们应当如何保持冷静?试着提醒自己,在这个世界上有些事并不是唐纳德·特朗普的错:

A) Beyoncé losing the Grammys.

A)碧昂斯(Beyoncé)失去了格莱美奖。

B) Collapse of Chipotle stock.

B)Chipotle公司股票崩溃。

C) Playboy half brother of North Korean dictator murdered in possible assassination by poison-needle-wielding women.

C)朝鲜独裁者的花花公子异母哥哥死了,可能是被女人用毒针暗杀的。

Life could always be worse. You could be related to supreme leader Kim Jong-un. And you can’t pin North Koreans on the Trump administration yet. Except for the part where our president dealt with the crisis over their new ballistic missile while dining at Mar-a-Lago in front of throngs of resort guests and their Facebook friends.

生活总是可能变得更糟。你可以把这些和最高领导人金正恩联系起来。而且你眼下还不能把朝鲜的事归咎于特朗普政府。除了我们的总统在马阿拉歌庄园(Mar-a-Lago)就餐时,当着大群客人和他们的Facebook好友处理最新发生的朝鲜导弹危机这种事。

It is true that Trump and Kim Jong-un both share an affinity for peculiar haircuts and public shows of adoration. And if the North Korean press were allowed to actually report stuff, the people there would undoubtedly also be holding their heads in their hands and moaning, “Oh God, what next????”

特朗普和金正恩确实有点相似之处,他们都偏好特殊的发型和公开表达的崇敬。如果朝鲜媒体被允许报道点真实的东西,那里的人们无疑也会双手抱头,呻吟道,“哦,天呐,接下来还有什么???”

But let’s dwell on the positive. At least Trump doesn’t have any half brothers. And did you hear the German shepherd won the Westminster dog show? How about that “La La Land”?

但让我们想想积极的事情。至少特朗普没有什么异母兄弟。你听说了吗,一条德国牧羊犬在威斯敏斯特狗展上获胜了?还有那个《爱乐之城》(La La Land)不错吧?

No fair mentioning there are only three years and 48 weeks to go.

更何况只剩下三年零48个星期了。

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