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学会放下,即是菩提

更新时间:2016-8-25 10:22:35 来源:纽约时报中文网 作者:佚名

The Cost of Holding On
学会放下,即是菩提

Let’s start with a story from Jon Muth’s book “Zen Shorts:”

我们先来讲讲琼·穆特(Jon Muth)的书《禅的故事》(Zen Shorts)里的一个故事。

Two traveling monks reached a town where there was a young woman waiting to step out of her sedan chair. The rains had made deep puddles and she couldn’t step across without spoiling her silken robes. She stood there, looking very cross and impatient. She was scolding her attendants. They had nowhere to place the packages they held for her, so they couldn’t help her across the puddle.

两名游方僧人来到一个小镇,看见一名年轻女子正等着下轿。轿子前面有雨水留下的水坑,她跨过去肯定会弄脏丝绸裙子。她站在那里,看起来非常恼火,很不耐烦的样子。她在训斥自己的侍从。他们手里拿着她的包裹,没地方放,无法帮她跨过水坑。

The younger monk noticed the woman, said nothing, and walked by. The older monk quickly picked her up and put her on his back, transported her across the water, and put her down on the other side. She didn’t thank the older monk; she just shoved him out of the way and departed.

年轻僧人看见了那名女子,什么也没说,径直走开了。年长僧人则马上把她背起来,跨过水坑后把她放下。她没有说谢谢,把他推开就走了。

As they continued on their way, the young monk was brooding and preoccupied. After several hours, unable to hold his silence, he spoke out. “That woman back there was very selfish and rude, but you picked her up on your back and carried her! Then, she didn’t even thank you!”

这两个僧侣继续赶路,年轻的那位闷闷不乐,一副心事重重的样子。几个小时后,他忍不住说道:“那个女的真是又自私又无礼,你背着她跨过水坑,她连句谢谢都不说!”

“I set the woman down hours ago,” the older monk replied. “Why are you still carrying her?”

“我几个小时前就把那个女人放下了,”年长僧人回答道。“你为什么还放不下呢?”

There is an actual cost to holding onto things we should let go of. It can come in the form of anger, frustration, resentment or something even worse. The question is, can you really afford to keep paying the bill?

把本该放下的事存在心头,真的会让人付出代价。那些代价可能是生气、沮丧、愤怒,甚至是更糟糕的感觉。问题是,你真的负担得起不断付出的代价吗?

The faster we learn to drop our emotional dead weight, the more room we create for something better. I’m talking about everything from stewing about the guy who cut you off in traffic this morning to still refusing to forgive an old friend for an event 20 years ago.

我们越快学会放下情绪负担,就能给更美好的事物留出更多空间。我说的是所有的情绪负担,包括因为早上有个家伙开车加塞而让你耿耿于怀,或者因为20年前的一件事而始终拒绝原谅一位老友。

We have only so much bandwidth. We have only so much time. We only have so much energy. Do we really want to invest any of our precious resources – financial or otherwise – into something that will return nothing but misery?

我们的带宽只有那么宽。我们只有这么多时间。我们只有这么多精力。我们真的想把经济上或其他方面的宝贵资源投入到一件只会带来痛苦的事情上吗?

My question for you is, “What’s one thing you can set down this week?”

我的问题是:“这一周你能放下哪件事?”

Go ahead and pick something. A fight with your spouse, something a politician said, your team losing the big game. Pick it, drop it and then pause. For just a moment, simply pause and savor what it feels like to no longer carry that burden and pay that price.

挑一件吧。跟配偶的一次争吵,一名政客说的话,你的队输掉的一场重要比赛。把它挑出来,放下,然后暂停。就暂停一会儿,享受一下不再承受那个负担、不再付出代价的感觉。

Then, I want you to invest that extra into something more productive. If it’s extra time, go for a walk. If it’s extra peace, take five deep breaths. If it’s extra money because you decided to just pay the stupid traffic ticket instead of letting it sit on your desk accruing late fees, then take that extra money and invest it in something that makes you happy.

然后,把省下的东西投入到更有益的事情上。如果你省下的是时间,那就去散个步。如果你是获得了平静,那就深呼吸五下。如果你决定支付那张愚蠢的交通罚单而不是让它留在你的书桌上累积滞纳金,那么把省下的钱花到让你快乐的东西上吧。

Play with your kids. Take a nap. Just do something that makes you feel the opposite of how you felt before you let go. I can guarantee you, this is one investment you’ll never regret.

陪孩子玩。打个盹儿。做一些让你获得与释怀前相反感受的事情。我可以向你保证,这是你永远不会后悔的一项投入。

And then, after you’re done with all that, send me an email. If you’re willing to share, I’d love to know what you decide to let go. Email me at hello@beingcarl.com. Last week’s emails were amazing, and I’m looking forward to reading more.

做完这些事情后,麻烦给我发一封电子邮件。如果你愿意分享,我很想知道你决定对什么释怀。请发邮件至hello@beingcarl.com。上周我收到的邮件很有意思,我期待读到更多邮件。

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